Prose Vs. Bullets Test Results - WhichTestWon

Results for: Swedish Union Conducts a Classic Copy Test: “Who We Are” Prose vs. “What You Get” Bullet Points

Winning Version

B

3 Comments

Reader Guesses:

  • VERSION B
  • VERSION A
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WhichTestWon's Analysis: (Click back to see versions A & B)

Bullet points with strong “you” oriented copy convinced 16% more visitors to apply for membership!

A team lead by Lars Johansson conducted this multivariate test, using Google Website Optimizer (see tech profile), on the membership benefits page of Unionen.se.

In translation, the winning bulleted copy read:

3 strong reasons to become a member.
As a member, you get, among other things:
* Income insurance that guarantees you 80% of your salary
* Career coaching, salary and development talks
* Advice, legal and negotiation help
Become a member

In translation, the “about us” prose read:

Unionen makes work life enjoyable.
With nearly half a million members, we are the largest union for the private sector. Unionen is widely represented, from large multinational corporations to small family-owned businesses. Our vision is to create job security, success and satisfaction. Do you want to join?

No matter what country or language your site is in, this type of test can give you a high ROI. However, as Lars learned, the winner is *not* predictable. His team ran a different prose vs. bullets test on another page of Unionen.se – that time the prose won!

> Tweet that you ‘Got it Right’ here.

> Tweet that you ‘Got it Wrong’ here.

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3 Comments: Post a comment

Really this test was about ‘You’ v ‘we’ rather than bullet v prose. It would be interesting to see purer bullet v prose tests with the same content.

I also think the shorter “you” bullet prose works better because it uses very keyword-friendly phrases that potential customers might type in ie “income insurance”. The prose version doesn’t include this phrase at all so it’s not obvious what the company is selling.
But I agree, it would be interesting to see which identical copy, in paragraph and bullet point format, converted visitors better.

Thanks for this post. LOL.

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